HIBARI KYOYA: User Guide and Maintenance Manual
by Cloverfish
Summary: CONGRATULATIONS! You are now the proud owner of a HIBARI KYOYA unit! In order to unlock the full potential of your sadistic prefect, it is recommended that you read the following manual with care...


**Authoress' rambles:** Before I begin, I have to mention a few things...

Regards for Theresa Green and this format. -wink- along with a little tweaking by me here and there. I've been having this idea for quite a while, actually, but Expresso-Latte beat me to it. -sigh- BUT! Since he had yet to make a Hibari one, I shall be the one to begin Hibatchan's!! Next, this should be a good break for me before I start doing Hysteria...heh heh... Saa, hajimemashou! By the way, forgive me if this contains some nonsense!!**_-rambling ends_**

**HIBARI KYOYA: The Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual**

**CONGRATULATIONS!** You are now the proud owner of a HIBARI KYOYA unit! In order to unlock the full potential of your own sadistic prefect of Namimori Junior High and also Vongola's Cloud Guardian, it is recommended that you read the following manual with care as mistreatment to the HIBARI KYOYA unit can and will proof hazardous to your health.

**Technical Specifications**

Name: Kyoya Hibari (will mostly respond at 'Hibari-san', 'Kyo-san', and 'Chairman-san'. Also responds indirectly at 'Skylark', 'Bird-boy', 'prefect-san', 'Kyoya-kun', and 'magic tonfa guy')

Age: 15

Place of Manufacture: Namimori, Japan

Height: 169 cm

Weight: 58 kg

Length: _(the editor of this manual had been threatened to be bitten to death if unit's length is showed)_

**Your HIBARI KYOYA unit comes with the following accessories:**

One Namimori Junior High formal uniform set

One Namimori Junior High uniform black coat

One Namimori Disciplinary Committee red band

One pair of _deadly magical tonfas_with grappler hooks and thorns

One _Hibird_ unit

**Removing your HIBARI KYOYA unit from his box**

Violent unit removal from the box will result in mass bloodshed (as proven by our staff), thus we recommend one of the following steps to remove your unit from his box:

Choice 1: You may prepare yourself a REBORN unit to pacify the HIBARI KYOYA unit, as it had been proven that only this unit has the ability to talk his way out of violence from the violent HIBARI KYOYA unit.

Choice 2: You can also keep a DINO CAVALLONE unit handy, just in case your HIBARI KYOYA unit goes on rampage the second it steps out of his box.

Choice 3: You can simply try and gently open the box by yourself. However, it is recommended that you have a SHAMAL unit nearby (or a ROMARIO unit, in case you do not have the privilege to use a SHAMAL unit) just in case the HIBARI KYOYA unit decides that you open his box a little too harshly.

**Programming**

After you manage to tame your unit, you will find out that your HIBARI KYOYA unit comes with quite some useful features, which are the following:

Martial Artist: Despite always using the pair of _deadly magical tonfas_™, your HIBARI KYOYA unit is fully capable to fight empty-handedly. Use this feature to win yourself the local karate competition!

Bodyguard: Taming your unit is hard, but once you manage to make the unit bow down under your superiority, you will notice that your HIBARI KYOYA unit is very loyal towards whatever gets his respect and attention. Under his self-consciousness driven loyalty, your HIBARI KYOYA unit will be ready to protect you from pineapple psycho MUKURO ROKUDO units or the trigger-happy XANXUS units on the loose!

Disciplinary Officer: Your HIBARI KYOYA unit has been known to be a very strict disciplinary committee chairman. Have an annoying-to-hell siblings to take care? Or maybe your school packs some delinquents that need some lessons? Your HIBARI KYOYA unit is fully capable to take care of any kinds of discipline offense!

Pet sitter: Although your HIBARI KYOYA unit may seem to be violent towards literally everything, this unit actually have a habit to unconsciously take care of pets like his _Hibird_unit, or even the _Leon_™ unit. Use this habit of your unit to start your own pet-sitting service!

Biology teacher: Your HIBARI KYOYA unit has a certain liking in biology, which also explains his nicknames to people, such as herbivores and such. Use this as an opportunity to help you with those annoying biology tasks and homeworks!

**Your HIBARI KYOYA unit will come in the following modes:**

_Creepy_

_Harshly sadist (default)_

_Pissed off_

_Out of Character (Locked)_

_High and mighty (default)_

_Caring (Locked)_

As mentioned many times in the manual, the HIBARI KYOYA unit tends to be harsh and prideful. If your HIBARI KYOYA unit threatens other units (or possibly, other people) with an 'I'll bite you to death', then do not panic. This is normal, as it also shows you that your HIBARI KYOYA unit is being in his _Harshly Sadist_ mode and not in his _Creepy_ mode, which is much, much, much more hazardous than the former. Your HIBARI KYOYA unit will tend to be destructive in his creepy mode.

The Out of Character mode and the Caring mode, both which are locked, can be unlocked by forcing your HIBARI KYOYA unit to undergo an anger management class with a HYPER TSUNA unit or a few continuous trips to the future with the _10-years-bazooka__. _Unlocking the Out of Character mode is fully the owner's responsibility, and the manufacturer have no responsibility over any kinds of BDSM, rape, or violent soap opera scenes.

**Relationships with other units:**

TSUNAYOSHI SAWADA: this unit is probably the only other unit that your HIBARI KYOYA unit would ever have the pleasure to be loyal to, as the TSUNAYOSHI SAWADA units comes with the default _I'm cute, I'm lovable, and I'm respectable _mode. However, in other modes, such as the _Clumsy _mode, your HIBARI KYOYA unit would rather bite this cute unit to death.

GOKUDERA HAYATO: your HIBARI KYOYA unit disses this unit, as GOKUDERA HAYATO units are dynamites-user, and dynamites explosions interrupts the discipline, and the HIBARI KYOYA unit is rather touchy when it comes to the discipline.

YAMAMOTO TAKESHI: this carefree unit is an all-around good-guy unit, which completely differs from your HIBARI KYOYA unit. However, your HIBARI KYOYA unit will have little problems dealing with this unit, especially since YAMAMOTO TAKESHI unit tends to be away from the HIBARI KYOYA unit, anyway.

SASAGAWA RYOHEI: this EXTREME!Unit especially made for sports-lover fans pisses your HIBARI KYOYA to the depths of hell. However, as long as the SASAGAWA RYOHEI steers clear of the HIBARI KYOYA unit, violence is certainly out of the list.

ROKUDO MUKURO: your HIBARI KYOYA unit holds an everlasting grudge towards this unit. In sight, your unit would most likely go all out and try to bite the ROKUDO MUKURO unit to death. However, if both units are in their Out of Characters mode, certain yaoi-filled relationships will bloom between these two eternal rivals.

**Cleaning**

Your HIBARI KYOYA unit would most likely try to bite you to death if you ever dare to try ask if he wants you to help him scrub his back.

**Feeding**

The HIBARI KYOYA unit would prefer to be given the freedom to feed himself outside rather than a traditional family dinner together in the crowds. It is suggested that you give up trying to keep him at home for dinner if you don't want to risk your head for a simple dinner.

**Rest**

It is understandable if your HIBARI KYOYA unit needs excessive sleep, considering his heavy work as a disciplinary committee and all. However, it is not suggested that you demand him to sleep with you, since it will most likely end up with tonfa marks all around your face.

**Frequently asked questions**

Q: My HIBARI KYOYA unit refuses to do what I said! What should I do?

A: It is normal for this unit to be all prideful and mighty, since it is his default mode. Getting respect from your HIBARI KYOYA unit is far from possible, and if you insists, you might as well want to get yourself the all-doer TSUNAYOSHI SAWADA unit or the all-around good-guy YAMAMOTO TAKESHI unit.

Q: I accidentally lost my unit's red armband and now it's wreaking havoc in the house!! Isn't there a way to stop this?

A: There is. Your problem is that you lost his precious red armband, and you haven't show any signs of responsibility. In order to stop him from flatting your house with the ground is either to buy a new one in the nearest store, or insists to him that it was time for him to retire from the committee. Although the latter one is not recommended, it would be the fastest solution to your problem.

Q: Someone stole my unit's Hibird and now my unit's gone!

A: Uh oh, your unit must have gone to search for his hibird. Unfortunately, until he found his bird companion, you'll have to be patient and wait for your unit at home.

Q: My HIBARI KYOYA unit called me a Herbivore

A: It's perfectly normal. HIBARI KYOYA units call people weaker than him herbivores. So it can't be helped.

**Troubleshooting**

Problem: Your HIBARI KYOYA unit had been seen tailing ROKUDO MUKURO units.

Solution: Congratulations, you have unlocked the hidden _fanboy_ mode of your HIBARI KYOYA. To get him out of this mode, in case you don't want a fanboy HIBARI KYOYA, all you have to do is simply tell him that the unit he was having his interest in was already having a relationship with another unit. This alone should get him out of his fanboy mode into his pissed of mode.

Problem: Instead of the sadistic prefect, you received a unit with formal attire and a hedgehog in a box.

Solution: You must have received the _Ten-years-later!version _of HIBARI KYOYA by accident. If you do not want to keep the unit, you may exchange him for the younger version by calling our Customer Support.

**End notes**

With proper care and maintenance, your HIBARI KYOYA will make a wonderful life companion. As your HIBARI KYOYA unit is a certified Bishonen™ unit, do clearly state in your dying will message to who are you leaving your unit too, unless you would like your HIBARI KYOYA unit to go rampage once your successors start a cat fight over as to who will inherit your unit, which will count as a crowd of herbivores to your HIBARI KYOYA unit.


End file.
